Hello, did you miss me? Heh. Figures

Fresh out of rehab, Screams from da Porch is back.

And speaking of treatment, anyone else think if you're dumb enough to, you know, imbibe a little booze through the butt then maybe you might just need a 30-day stay?

Oh well, never judge a butt by its chugger. Heh. Been wanting to print that for awhile. Can't spell butt without a “UT.” Hahahahahaha.

Special thanks to Xander Broughton for that one. Cause, you know, the school needed another black eye. Eh, he'll probably run the country some day.

And . . . speaking of running the country (vote for me please), I read last night that Mitt's buddy, the good Paul Ryan (two first names??) won't explain the dynamic duo's tax plan. “It would take me too long to go through all the math,” he said.

“Trust me, you're all retarded,” is what he meant. Ryan didn't seem to have a problem when he told folks that he ran a sub-three hour marathon. Oh yeah, he messed the math up on that one.

Strange. If someone told me a year ago that out of Obama, the catcher's Mitt, Ryan (or whoever the then-future VP pick would be) and Biden, that smokin' Joe was going to be the most believable out of all of them . . . well, whatever.

And for those who thinking I'm just making fun of the Republicans, well, here: Click right smack here. I'm pretty sure one of the videos pokes the other guy.

In the meantime, I'm still pulling for Captain America.

Anyhoo, so why did I decide to come back? Eh, it doesn't matter. Enjoy the ramblings, there will be more to follow.